Estimated reading time: 9 minute(s)
Continuing on this theme of what is sin, and what does it do to us… I was reading the story of David and Bathsheba again today. (sidenote… I have always thought that she has the funniest name in light of the rest of the story…) We all know that story. What’s that? You don’t? Well, let me recount it to you quickly… (ha ha ha) 🙂
Background on King David
David has spent something like 30 years as the publicly proclaimed King of Israel but hiding in caves running from the current king in power – Saul. God told Samuel to annoint David as king and then everything went downhill from there. Everything David did was successful – God was definitely with him… so, Saul was jealous and tried to kill David – several times! And David faithfully (though he was more powerful, and though he knew God had annointed him as king) refused to play God and take matters into his own hands. He knew that was God’s job, and no matter how hairy it got, he stuck to that conviction.
Scripture tells the stories of all the battles David won against God’s enemies. And it says several times that David was “a man after God’s own heart.”
The Bathing Beauty
But then it happened. One day, after David woke up from a nap, he went out on his balcony which overlooked the city and as he was looking around, he noticed a woman taking a bath on her roof (and The Message says, “The woman was stunningly beautiful”).
Now, David had this thing for the ladies. Really. I am reading through the Bible in a year and so if I remember correctly from recent readings, David already has 3 wives and in 2 Sam 5:13 it says, “David married more wives and concubines, and had many sons and daughters.” Whoa! 🙂
So, he wanted more. This woman was stunningly beautiful and he wanted her. Which, I guess by the culture he was living in would have been fine. So he asked someone to go find out who she was. The report came back that she was Bathsheba, the wife of Uriah the Hittite.
(A little more background… remember that David had been on the run for decades? During that time a band of tough guys joined forces with him (called the Mighty Men) and Uriah was one of these loyal, awesome dudes.)
Turning Point #1
This is the turning point. A huge cavern between the period at the end of 2 Sam 11:3 and the first letter of verse 4. A moment when David could have honored God or himself. He has already set his heart in motion toward this lady. (read more about the power of our hearts out of control below…)
What a huge bummer when he finds out she is not available. How he hoped that she would be. She would make a fine addition to his wife collection. But… she’s not available. She is Uriah’s wife. I will honor Uriah and God by moving on. She’s not available. But… she is… kinda. She’s all alone… her husband is away… she really is beautiful… it’s just one time… it can’t be that bad… can it?
The argument perhaps raged for a good while – David has been so faithful in his life – so focused on what was right and good. Three chapters ago, God said this about David, “David reigned over all Israel and was fair to everyone.” EVERYONE? Whoa. David was a really cool guy. With strong convictions, and huge faith and trust to carry them out. So there must have been a battle. Whether at this moment or previously… the battle was raging.
But then we come to verse 4, and the text reads: “Then David sent for her.” There’s more, but that says it all. Now, don’t get me wrong… Bathsheba had to agree to come, agree to hang out, agree to get in bed… she is quite culpable as well… but, the weight of this decision – the guilt of the sin I believe – is right here in those 5 words. When David sent for her, that is when he intended to “despise God” (as he is later accused of doing) and do what seemed right in his own eyes.
So, they have this one-night-stand kinda thing… David probably had some remorse about it, but, ya know… being king, he pretty much got away with it. He had fun with Bathsheba, and she went home… end of story. But she got pregnant. Oh my… the consequences of sin. One bad choice… leads to a predicament.
David sends word to the battlefield that he wants Uriah to come home and give a report to him about the war. Uriah heeds the call and reports to David all that God is doing. After some small talk – most likely quite awkward on David’s part at least – David says, “Go home and relax.” All part of a pretty sneaky plan to cover his tracks.
The next day, David is quite angry to find that Uriah did not go home. He stayed in Jerusalem at the palace entrance. He did not sleep with his wife… he did not give David an easy way out.
Turning Point #2
Again, we come to a turning point. Perhaps another battle raged in the heart and mind of the Man after God’s Own Heart. He even had a whole day to think about it. Uriah slept one more night at the palace entrance. He could own up to his sin and ask forgiveness from the man he wronged. (That’s BIG owning up as adultery was serious stuff in God’s law… stoning for both offenders) Or, he could find another way to cover his tracks.
The next morning, David decided to go his way again and sent the command to have Uriah put at the front of the battle when he returns and for everyone else to pull back so he would be killed. OK, HOLD ON HERE. Man After God’s Own Heart??? What’s going on here? What happened to the man who TWICE was in a position to kill the man (King Saul) who was hunting him and both times refused to take matters into his own hands. The same man who relented from exacting revenge on Nabal who had wronged him and his men. The same man who had so much faith that he took on a NINE-FOOT warrior with just a sling shot and some stones?
How did he get here? Uriah was sent to the front of the battle, and killed, as David had asked. And again, the commander who gave the order, the other soldiers… others have responsibility in this too… but, ultimately… David killed Uriah. And for what? To cover his tracks? To get his wife? David is later confronted by a prophet named Nathan who accuses David (well, God through Nathan) of having “murdered Uriah and stolen his wife.” He also says, “Why, then, have you despised the word of the LORD and done this horrible deed?”
This was not pretty. This was certainly not “after God’s own heart”. So what happened? How DID he get there? How do we? How do we go so far that men who dedicate their lives to serving God are accused in the dozens of molesting little boys? That people in positions of trust are guilty of violating that trust to the point of rape and murder?
One Small Step for Mankind, One Giant Leap for Sin
Sin is progressive. We are sinful by nature. David said in Psalm 51 after his eyes were opened to the sheer ugliness of what he had done, “I was born a sinner”. He’s right. It is our nature. To choose for ourself. To go against God’s wisdom. And usually it starts small. A stray thought. A prideful moment. A bending of the line.
Often there is a battle… a fierce battle at times. But often we shield ourselves from it and press on down the path we should not be on. One little step after another leads to bigger ones. Sometimes to cover our guilt or shame. Sometimes because we had fun. Sometimes because we didn’t get caught. Whatever the reason… it starts to snowball.
And before you know it, we have killed a man and “taken (his) wife to be (our) own.”
A broken and repentant heart…
Do you find yourself asking, “How did I get here?” I just read an old journal entry today, and I was writing about stuff that I have been dealing with for years. Ways of thinking that are contrary to God’s heart. And I said those very words. “How did I get here again?” My heart still belonged to God, but it had fallen in a pool of mud and needed some serious cleaning.
Thankfully, that is what God does. I love the line in the story where after David confesses his sin (“I have sinned against the LORD”) Nathan says to him, “Yes, but the LORD has already forgiven you.” I think that is SO COOL! David needed to surrender the fight to do what he wanted to do… but not IN ORDER to receive forgiveness… it was to clean his heart… to make the relationship right.
We SO OFTEN live with the guilt-driven idea of confession being a necessary thing to receive God’s forgiveness. The idea of making a list, checking it twice – and devulging our every evil to our Maker. We do this expecting that he will forgive. But, we also do it SO THAT he will. I think this line from Nathan more accurately reflects the heart of God.
Jesus said the words, “It is finished.” and everything changed. Before that, God could choose to forgive looking forward to the cross which covered the sins of everyone. But now we have the assurance of forgiveness… always. Not a forgiveness that comes each time we offer a sacrifice for each blunder committed. Not a forgiveness for some sins, but withheld for others more heinous (or more plentiful). A total and complete forgiveness. “A Broken and repentant heart, O God, you will not despise.”
When we are at a spot where we start asking, “How did I get HERE?”, we have made bad choices. We are in a bad spot. But there is hope. As we admit our bad choices, and seek to restore our relationship with Jesus… he is there waiting for us. It is several steps, small but persisitent to get to where we ask “How did I get here?” … but a 180 degree turn gets us back to a right relationship with Jesus.
That, my friends, is amazing. And equally in a completely opposite kinda way makes me ask, “How did I get here???”