Estimated reading time: 2 minute(s)
I was observing my three-year-old daughter and her one-year-old sister today as they tried to play together. They were just a few feet in front of me, and truthfully, it was not going well.
Julia, the younger, was taking things from Kirstie, the older, and this was not a welcome action. Kirstie was just whining about it, and then taking matters into her own hand, retrieving what had been taken. Of course, this only exacerbated the situation, so I decided to step in.
“Kirstie,” I said in my most parental, instructional tone of voice, “That is just not going to work. You can’t whine, and you can’t just take the blocks back from her. How would you like it if she did that to you? This is a good chance for you to practice ‘Treat others the way you want to be treated.’ Why don’t you ask her for what you want, instead of just take it?”
She followed my instructions and her younger sister gladly gave up her blocks (which were stolen in the first place…) and everyone was smiling. For about two seconds. That’s when older sister decided to just take some more of what younger sister had. This resulted in very loud, shrill screaming.
Again… not going to fly with Dad.
Since this didn’t seem to be getting through, so I said to the perpetrator Julia, “Julia, why don’t you show Kirstie what it feels like. Take that yellow block on the top of her tower.” Julia was happy to oblige. She reached over and grabbed three blocks from the top of Kirsten’s tower. (She was probably pretty amazed I was letting her do this!)
Once the blocks were safely in Julia’s possession, I asked Kirstie, “Now how do you feel?”
To my surprise, the first response came from Julia who said, “Good!”
Haha! That was too funny. Kind of ruined the moment, and taught the wrong lesson, but… at least we know that when you’re allowed to do whatever you want… it feels good. 🙂