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Money continues to be an issue in the Campbell home. Weeks go by sometimes where bills are not paid. We are paying the “big” ones, or the ones who have the most penalty for late payments. But in most every area, money is coming in more slowly than our creditors would like us to dish it out.
Now, I am no slacker. I am working long days, and even some nights. And something my parents instilled in me from my early years is to do everything with excellence. That’s definitely part of who I am. Sometimes that’s annoying, but usually it’s helpful. 🙂
But still, the money just is not there.
This morning, I think I remembered a major reason why we don’t have as much money as we would like.
We have a doctor’s appointment this morning. A routine baby check-up. Leaving in about 20 minutes, actually. I have always liked to go along for those as they are a cool moment of connecting with our baby that we don’t get otherwise. Just hearing the rush of the baby’s heart or talking about the baby brings a sense of reality that is not present (for me) in everyday life. And, I just like to go with Jen, so she’s not having to go by herself. That’s no fun.
This pregnancy is different, though. I do want to go for all of the reasons above, but I am also thinking about what happened last fall, when we went to doctors and there were not good reports from the womb. And then, when we finally heard and saw that our baby had died. Those were not good moments. And I definitely do not want Jen to be there alone for something like that.
So, the only reason it is a dilemma is my current workload is off the charts. We have two gigs this weekend, which these days is abnormal, and all of a sudden I have LOTS of web business – which is, of course, a giant blessing from God. So, I was up early today, getting some stuff started, and wrestling with myself over whether I should stay home and get the work done I need to do which brings money into our home, or, should I go with Jen for a two-hour doctor visit (with travel time) for the reasons mentioned above?
That’s when I realized, I will never make a million dollars.
It was almost no contest. Jen, the baby, and my family win hands down. It is far superior to be together, to share life than it is that I stay here and earn money. Money is necessary, but can not drive our lives. At least not mine. But, there is the rub. We often wonder why we don’t have a lot of money… but that’s it. We don’t really love money. We don’t really want it. We do… but we don’t. We are not compelled to spend time to earn money over anything involving family or other relationships. Again, not talking laziness here, just… priorities.
So, sorry Dad. I know you’re counting on me to take care of you in your old age. 🙂 And I will. But not necessarily by buying you stuff. 🙂 I will go with you to all your doctors appointments, and we can share life together, along with perhaps even your great grand kids. 🙂
But I’m pretty sure I’ll never make a million dollars.