Estimated reading time: 3 minute(s)
Tonight I dug out my old journals. I was looking for any account of the story of Ian’s birth. Actually, the journals only go back to late 1999, and nothing was written even remotely close to Ian’s birthday (it was Christmas, after all!) so I had no luck there…
But I did find a bit of a treasure.
The first thing I noticed… my hand writing was NOT any better back then. Well OK, perhaps it actually has gotten worse, but I will definitely not win any penmanship awards. Handwriting aside, the content in many ways made me smile, in some ways made me sad, and in most ways just floored me.
It was so crazy to read about the things that I was dealing with then. Some of them continue, and may till the day I die. Others have so vastly improved it’s unreal. Those are neat to see. But I think the one thing I noticed the most from just skimming the surface is the way that I approach life.
These days I handle things with a bit more … ease? I can’t find the right word. Actually in many ways I was impressed with the way I was definitely living in the center of God’s love for me. But I think that might also be the place I have grown the most. In understanding the depth of his love for me, and just how far it really reaches into my life.
Throughout the pages I read I heard one continuing theme (whether I was feeling up, down, or sideways… or whatever) I loved God with all my heart, and I trusted him with my entire life. That was at the core of everything I wrote, and everything I was trying to do, and even at the core of every failure. It actually reminded me very much of David. Which is really cool, because God called David, “a man after my own heart”. (Let’s skip over the part about being a polygamist who had one of his most loyal friends killed so that he could have his friend’s wife after already impregnating her… that’s not the part I’m looking to emulate…)
I hope that in another 6-8 years I can look back on these 1,000, or 2,000, or 10,000 posts and read through them and see how I certainly didn’t have life figured out (I’ll probably chuckle at how much I didn’t have figured out) and also how I will probably be struggling with many of the same things. But most of all I hope that I can see a constant thread running through my every thought, struggle, victory, etc…
Love God with all you’ve got, and love the people he puts next to you.
I hope that’s not just in the words I write here, or in my journals, or anywhere I might get to share my written thoughts. I hope that is most evident in my life, the way I live. I hope that when I die – whenever that might be – people will remember Greg Campbell not just for his words, but for the way he loved God, and loved the people around him.
That’s what I’d like to see in the rearview mirror.