Estimated reading time: 3 minute(s)
I got to spend the evening with our oldest son, Ian. We try hard to get each of our kids one night with Dad and nobody else. They’re called “OK Nights” (for “One Kid” Nights) and they usually happen once a week, if we’re on a good pace. So, doing the math, each kid gets their OK Night about once every 5 or 6 weeks.
Tonight was Ian’s turn.
What was fun and different about tonight is that Ian is getting older. He really is. He’s more of a person, which… feels weird to say. Of course he’s always been a person, and actually, it’s really cool to see the “person” that our one year old daughter is, too. But it’s just a little different with Ian. I think maybe it’s the struggles. They’re just different. He’s learning who he is, too. And he’s tender-hearted, compassionate, and sensitive to begin with, so when he gets swept away in the deluge of needy tiny people each day… well it’s just harder to actually get to learn who you are!
So after a great night of just being together, with no schedule, no demands, and no distractions from my attention, I asked him this:
“Ian, I know you’ve heard me say that I think God is teaching me that the greatest thing we can know is that we are loved, and especially that we are lovable. And since you know that… I just wondered, how can I help you feel that? How can I help you feel loved, and especially lovable?”
What I love is that there was only a slight hesitation and then he very openly told me. That was fantastic. I love the openness that we have engendered in our family!
We talked about what it means to know you are loved, to feel loved, and to feel lovable. They are similar, but different. He had some pretty cool answers, too. First was of course, any time we can do an OK Night he feels loved and lovable! 🙂 But there was more, and since it was an open and personal conversation … the details will not be shared here. 🙂
I will say this: I hope you feel lovable. I’m really not sure how you get there. I can quote some scriptures… “We love because he first loved us,” and, “[adopting us as his children] gave [God] great pleasure,” and, “[God] will rejoice over you with singing,” and plenty more. We know it, but… it doesn’t matter until we know it.
So do you? If not, what is it about you that you don’t think is lovable? What part of you is beyond anyone’s love? We’re all pretty good at being selfish. Some of us are good at loving, really loving, but mostly we’re better at protecting ourselves from real or perceived hurt. And we don’t really live because of that.
“[Jesus] came to give you life, and life to the full.”
“God is love.”
“… and the greatest of [faith, hope and love] is love.”
Love completely transforms us, and even the world we know around us. To be loved. To love. To know we are lovable.
May you know that right now today, and every tomorrow.